Question - Gender identity, sexual orientation...are they the same?
(Image from the Genderbread Person)
They are all different! And it is important to know the difference, because people don't neatly fall into a binary. Even for biological sex, which for a majority of situations are a binary, there are occasions where people are born intersex and end up in the middle of the spectrum.
This is a complicated topic and I am definitely no expert. But I did chance upon a good site, with a very simple illustration that explains this the difference between "Gender Identity", "Gender Expression", "Biological Sex" and "Sexual Orientation" very clearly, called the Genderbread Person. I won't attempt to rephrase what the 4 components means, you can read about it more on their website.
But let's try to run through two examples to illustrate. Do forgive me if I didn't capture this correctly 😅 For the typical heterosexual male, it will be as follows:
- Gender Identity - "I identify as a Man"
- Gender Expression - "I wear masculine attire and behave as a man would"
- Biological Sex - "I am born Male"
- Sexual Orientation - "I am Heterosexual. I am turned on by women."
For me, I suppose it is as follows:
- Gender Identity - "I identify as Genderqueer. On most days I am a Man, but I also identify as a Woman on other days"
- Gender Expression - "I wear masculine attire and behave as a man would, but I am also very feminine and love to show my female side to the world. I am not androgynous"
- Biological Sex - "I am born Male"
- Sexual Orientation - "I am Heterosexual. I am turned on by women."
It is totally understandable why people get confused with the terms. They just seem so similar! It gets even more confusing if we ask questions like "Am I heterosexual or homosexual, if I like (1) mtf crossdressers or (2) other men, but only when I'm dressed as a woman?". Personally, for (1) I think you are heterosexual since I view mtf crossdressers as women. For (2) you are heterosexual. However, it is likely that you are also attracted to women or other crossdressers in male mode, so by extension you are bisexual.
It is all rather confusing, I must admit. I am probably not entirely correct in my assessment above. If we in the LGBTQ community already get confused about the terms, those who are outside of the community will find it even harder to wrap their heads around this. It is also very easy for them to pigeonhole us into a binary, as general society has done. So we do need to be a bit forgiving if people don't fully understand the differences. However, the main message should be that Gender Identity, Expression, and Sexuality isn't binary, but a spectrum. And we shouldn't beat ourselves up for who we just because we don't fall neatly into the either ends.
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